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Post by rodders on Nov 24, 2021 14:34:45 GMT
As some of you may know my Brother 7 years younger than me died unexpectedly in August 2020 in Thailand . Thanks to help from Riggers attached (photos at end of thread now) are some photographs of his funeral. I would like to think that not only was I a brother to him but in many ways a father I bought him his first Cricket Bat , his first train set and took him to his first Football match. He was a poor tormented soul who found some happiness in later life in Thailand where he married a Thai girl( woman really).
As he was happy there and that was his home I decided that it was best that his remains should stay there and also felt it the right thing to for his wife. I am told over 300 people (local villagers) attended his funeral and the following photographs are of the funeral and some thing they did in his memory on the first Christmas after his death.
I am glad to say that I have sorted out his affairs and have been able to ensure his wife has a reasonably comfortable financial future.In Thailand I am told that foreigners are not allowed to own property so the house they lived in is already his wife's. The big chap in the photo is Jon Oxford an Australian chap married to another villager who informed me of Roy's death and was a great help in sorting things out
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Post by rodders on Jan 9, 2022 12:09:39 GMT
As some of you may know my Brother 7 years younger than me died unexpectedly in August 2020 in Thailand . Thanks to help from Riggers attached are some photographs of his funeral. I would like to think that not only was I a brother to him but in many ways also his father , I bought him his first Cricket Bat , his first train set and took him to his first Football match. He was a poor tormented soul who found some happiness in later life in Thailand where he married a Thai girl( woman really). As he was happy there and that was his home I decided that it was best that his remains should stay there and also felt it the right thing to for his wife. I am told over 300 people (local villagers) attended his funeral and the following photographs are of the funeral and some thing they did in his memory on the first Christmas after his death. I am glad to say that I have sorted out his affairs and have been able to ensure his wife has a reasonably comfortable financial future.In Thailand I am told that foreigners are not allowed to own property so the house they lived in is already his wife's. The big chap in the photo is Jon Oxford an Australian chap married to another villager who informed me of Roy's death and was a great help in sorting things out Hope may be of interest he had a Buddhist funeral |
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Post by rodders on Jan 10, 2022 12:16:16 GMT
My brother was affectionately known in the village where he lived as P Roy (Old Roy). I sent him a Brentford Football Shirt with that printed on it and also a programme of the last ever game at Griffin Park, suspect they did not arrive before he died
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Post by Hodgy on Jan 10, 2022 17:27:54 GMT
My brother was affectionately known in the village where he lived as P Roy (Old Roy). I sent him a Brentford Football Shirt with that printed on it and also a programme of the last ever game at Griffin Park, suspect they did not arrive before he died Sadly you may be correct if you are talking about the play off semi final win against Swansea July 2020. Was great to see Brentford beat the same opposition in the 2021 play off final. Very nice touch and a great present. Stay proud, I would love to have a brother like you. |
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Post by rodders on Jan 14, 2022 15:37:27 GMT
I hope some of you found the photos interesting and agree it was not all doom an gloom and can see that those in his village cared and did their best for him ( his wife poor woman) lost over the past 2/3 years her brother , her husband( my brother) and her son. I will not bore you further but to explain how my brother ended up in Thailand:
He was in a not very happy marriage which ended in divorce , and he went back to live with our mother in the home he had been born in and brought up in which was rented. Our mother died in 2000 and Roy despite advise ti the contrary and typical of him did not tell the landlords. Some years later this came to light and he was assured that there might be a small increase in rent but he could continue living there. Nothing further happened and Roy being Roy was content to let things drift.
Fast forward to I think Christmas Eve 2010 or last working day before when he received a hand delivered letter from a firm of Solicitors acting for the Landlords, threatening to evict, and/ or increase rent and suggesting that he could be liable for arrears of rent circa £40000. He already had mental health problems and this threw him totally over the top, in fact he took to his bed hoping it would all go away, of course it did not. I got his MP involved which made it worse as they quoted the wrong law to the solicitors. I am not intimidated by such but the solicitors refused totally to deal with me, and never withdrew their threat re pursuing him for money he did not have.
Some years previously he had gone on holiday to Thailand and met a Girl ( she was a woman really ) and they seemed to hit it off ( a puzzle to me as he was never very good with woman). Any way he just upped and left and went to Thailand leaving behind entire contents of house(flat) and most of personal and family possessions.
I only saw him one more time when he was forced by Santander to come back to England to arrange for the small amount of Money he had to be transferred to Thailand, as they refused to cooperate in any other way. We spoke once or twice a week by phone when I would try to sort out his problems. For example he had prostate problems and needed catheters which I sorted out for him and ordered them from England and sent them on to him. My haunting regret is the last time I spoke to him on the Wednesday before he died I cut him short as we were expecting my brother in law to come. Roy I remember said I have not been well But I an ok now. On the Sunday the phone rang to tell me he had died.
Solicitors refereed to Kandlar and Company of Temple Fortune near Finchley
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Post by admin on Jan 14, 2022 15:54:02 GMT
All interesting stuff Rodders. That's life. It's fine when it all works, as Facebook would have you believe, but you rarely see the difficult bits posted. You did your best and anyone who doesn't have a regret when someone passes is bloody hard to find, if they exist at all.
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Post by Hodgy on Jan 14, 2022 22:40:17 GMT
I hope some of you found the photos interesting and agree it was not all doom an gloom and can see that those in his village cared and did their best for him ( his wife poor woman) lost over the past 2/3 years her brother , her husband( my brother) and her son. I will not bore you further but to explain how my brother ended up in Thailand: He was in a not very happy marriage which ended in divorce , and he went back to live with our mother in the home he had been born in and brought up in which was rented. Our mother died in 2000 and Roy despite advise ti the contrary and typical of him did not tell the landlords. Some years later this came to light and he was assured that there might be a small increase in rent but he could continue living there. Nothing further happened and Roy being Roy was content to let things drift. Fast forward to I think Christmas Eve 2010 or last working day before when he received a hand delivered letter from a firm of Solicitors acting for the Landlords, threatening to evict, and/ or increase rent and suggesting that he could be liable for arrears of rent circa £40000. He already had mental health problems and this threw him totally over the top, in fact he took to his bed hoping it would all go away, of course it did not. I got his MP involved which made it worse as they quoted the wrong law to the solicitors. I am not intimidated by such but the solicitors refused totally to deal with me, and never withdrew their threat re pursuing him for money he did not have. Some years previously he had gone on holiday to Thailand and met a Girl ( she was a woman really ) and they seemed to hit it off ( a puzzle to me as he was never very good with woman). Any way he just upped and left and went to Thailand leaving behind entire contents of house(flat) and most of personal and family possessions. I only saw him one more time when he was forced by Santander to come back to England to arrange for the small amount of Money he had to be transferred to Thailand, as they refused to cooperate in any other way. We spoke once or twice a week by phone when I would try to sort out his problems. For example he had prostate problems and needed catheters which I sorted out for him and ordered them from England and sent them on to him. My haunting regret is the last time I spoke to him on the Wednesday before he died I cut him short as we were expecting my brother in law to come. Roy I remember said I have not been well But I an ok now. On the Sunday the phone rang to tell me he had died. Solicitors refereed to Kandlar and Company of Temple Fortune near Finchley That’s a really touching post Rodders. The emotion and detail of such times must have been so hard to manage. The real positive is your brother was happy with his new life, to which he found happiness. He made a very brave decision and past away surrounded by love, not bedraggled by worry and sadness. You also need to be proud of everything you have done, you could not have done more. He raised himself from sad times and turned his life to happiness. Let go off the negativity and remember the good times you had and that he found what made him so happy. I watched a movie last night called ‘The Shack’. Watch it. I think it might help you grieve. I hope. |
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Post by rodders on Aug 9, 2022 17:48:07 GMT
2 years today since my brother died. I have lighted a candle in his memory and raised a glass. Still hear from his wife though language barrier make things difficult
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Post by Hodgy on Aug 10, 2022 10:11:31 GMT
2 years today since my brother died. I have lighted a candle in his memory and raised a glass. Still hear from his wife though language barrier make things difficult Good on you Rodders. I understand losing your brother still pains you. Time is a healer, it doesn’t mean we ever forget but eventually start to accept the situation. |
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Post by admin on Aug 10, 2022 23:14:20 GMT
Images not found? Don't know what's gone wrong there? Will need to look at the hosting site. I may have deleted them although I didn't think that I had?
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Post by rodders on Aug 14, 2022 14:05:58 GMT
Would be nice to have them back ' but don't worry too much about it. I have my own copies and once seen probably not very interesting to others.
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Post by rodders on Aug 8, 2023 18:51:32 GMT
2 years today since my brother died. I have lighted a candle in his memory and raised a glass. Still hear from his wife though language barrier make things difficult Good on you Rodders. I understand losing your brother still pains you. Time is a healer, it doesn’t mean we ever forget but eventually start to accept the situation. 3 years now. Lit another Candle for him. |
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Post by Hodgy on Aug 8, 2023 19:37:11 GMT
Good on you Rodders. I understand losing your brother still pains you. Time is a healer, it doesn’t mean we ever forget but eventually start to accept the situation. 3 years now. Lit another Candle for him. Time moves so fast, especially as we get older. You had such a strong bond with your brother. I have lit a candle tonight too. |
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Post by admin on Aug 9, 2023 0:01:28 GMT
Would be nice to have them back ' but don't worry too much about it. I have my own copies and once seen probably not very interesting to others. I'll have another look tomorrow Rodders (or today as it now is) to see if they are still on my hosting site. |
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Post by admin on Aug 9, 2023 21:30:46 GMT
Good on you Rodders. I understand losing your brother still pains you. Time is a healer, it doesn’t mean we ever forget but eventually start to accept the situation. 3 years now. Lit another Candle for him. They were not saved but I still had your e-mail so just uploaded them again (or the ones that I thought you'd like?)        |
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Post by rodders on Aug 10, 2023 10:36:34 GMT
Thanks Riggers
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